When did
you and I stop
stepping in
our own heads
and
start walking
together? Ten,
twanty-flah
feet ago, and already
this...
Together down a bluff into a taboo
of light dropping onto
a wet mirror rimmed with waves—
like us, as sparkling
as it is broken
on its edges— I was
thinking of an empty space,
when really all was full and in its right place.
I'm looking into my companion
“looking into you” she returns like a greeting
She is new as my face after a
long night.
There is her voice,
a heavy scent ( incense and slow coffee),
dark eyes (more in depth than colors)
And me (more with than at) between
empty crests of thinking and listening, over
into broken edges, sounding water:
“Don't be a stranger,”
says either-is- both of us, over
and over;
something in our arms (spindle fibers, daughter cells)
hugs and separates. I think
I probably will be, though, coming
out with all my work to do—
good as she
was. Good as
that walk was.
It was, and on that,
tomorrow
will be.
I related a lot to the idea in this poem that I think you were trying to relay being how we often don’t realize how much a person can mean to us just because there are a few flaws in the specific relationship. The spaces between the first few words of the poems versus the condensed structure at the end made me think about how the distance there can be between two people who are too immersed in the unnecessary facets, rather than the more important aspects of the relationship which is simply to love. The line that stood out most to me in this poem was “a wet mirror rimmed with waves-- like us, as sparking as it is broken on the edges” because it shows how a relationship can appear to be beautiful, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t problems underneath the surface, and ignoring these problems would only create more dissonance between the two lovers.
ReplyDeleteThe primary thing that stands out to me about this poem is its disjointed and fragmented nature, with short bursts of texts which create a strong feeling of uneasiness, as if the speaker is trying to display the fragmented and disjointed way in which they are remembering this interaction, unsure of certain aspects, and with some aspects which stand out more than others. The poem reminds me of those certain memories which have a very strong emotion associated with them, but the specific details of the event have been lost, replaced only with a sense of warmth and joy in some cases, and emptiness or sadness in others. The way in which the speaker remembers an item in the couple’s arms, but not the item, emphasizes this idea that it is a strongly emotional memory from the past, one in which the raw emotion has filled the place of specific sensory details. The structure of the poem also adds to this, with the flame like shape mirroring the intense, burning emotion which the speaker seems to be recalling, as well as adding an image of the destruction of those aspects of the memory due to the consuming nature of the symbolic flame of emotion.
ReplyDeleteThe format and structure of this poem struck me immediately. The fragmented sentences and the varying amounts of space between the words on each line made me have an emotional reaction to the poem. To me, the poem describes a relationship between to people and explores what it means to be connected to someone. The way the words are condensed at the beginning and end, but very spread out in the middle, demonstrates the way two people can be close, grow apart, and come back together. The images of emptiness and broken edges make me think of relationships that may have been lost. I felt that the end of the poem left me on a hopeful note that the connection can be restored. The shift from past tense to future in the final sentence stresses this idea as well. There were moments in the poem that felt sad, like a relationship was falling apart, but there were also parts that seemed happy and hopeful. The poem seemed to stress that human connections aren’t broken when two people grow apart. Just because they are not as close as they once were doesn’t mean the connection they share is gone.
ReplyDeleteI really enjoy this poem. I feel like it encapsulates the connection between two people very well. The opening question of the poem resonated with me: "When did you and I stop stepping into our own heads and start walking together?" It's just so accurate; whether someone with whom we have a romantic connection to or with a close friend, I think we tend to ask the question about when we cross the threshold from being strangers to entering a connected state together. I believe that it begins to happen as soon as one forgets his or her own “head” and is vulnerable with the person. I like the light imagery on (what I infer to be) the ocean, and this sense that not only are the two people connected to each other but they have a connection with the ocean. The title “Don’t be a stranger…” coupled with the opening question and the following imagery makes me think of the exciting transition from being strangers to one another to feeling like the connection couldn’t be stronger, and I think that occurs because of vulnerability. I could be wrong, but as soon as I finished the poem that’s immediately what I thought of.
ReplyDelete-Caitlin Mitchell
Could be wrong - but either way. Thank you for being vulnerable
DeleteThe first thing that stands out about this poem is its shape, partially because the shape is what you immediately see when you look at it. The shape reminds me of the part of the beach where the waves meet the sand and leave swirls. The collage at the top is interesting because the two figures seem to be from different worlds. The man is facing upright but seems to be walking on his hands (the floor is above him, so it almost looks like he is reaching up and worshiping the shadow of the woman). The woman is walking normally, but upside down, and the photo of her seems to be closer as well. Despite the differences, the two are on the same plane, with the floor for both of them being aligned, which reminds me of how the two in the poem are so deeply intertwined, which is especially highlighted in the phrase “she returns like a greeting” which to me reminds me of how when you meet someone new or even greet someone old, even with different relationships and people and contexts, a greeting comes with the same feeling of connection. The poem reminds me of the feeling you get when you are in a waiting room with someone you have never met before, or you pass a stranger in the street, and you accidentally make eye contact with them, but you smile, and they smile back. It reminds me of the loss after that person walks away, or you get called into your appointment and when you come back they are gone. Like you never really knew them, but you knew that they were human as well. It’s interesting that the end of relationships often comes with this feeling as well. - Clairette L.
ReplyDelete