As I finish each of A Year of July's 3 chapters, I'll give teasers of them here.
So here's from part 1 ...
“Ions at the Crest”
– 9 May 2010
My eyes are filled so high with hope
that it’s dangerous to drive,
And perilous to speak at all, and wild
to be alive;
I am a crash-in-waiting, I am a coil
unwound,
I am the crackling runner-bolt that
rises from the ground.
I do not know what “lightning” is.
I only know you/me—
Like a silver magnet’s drawing power
without its gravity.
I’m rising and I’m rising up (I
know this means a fall—
But at this peak, the world is air: I
can’t retract or stall).
You dwell up there, cool and covered in
a static droplet brine.
I draw in from the edges here, working
toward your current line.
You are the crackling cloud-dome, love;
I am the field below
Who breaks for you so many times you’ll
never even know.
“Books Versus Heartaches”
– 31 August, 2010
My books are dead, I see;
Only those yet to die can yearn.
Like—I asked and she said “Don’t”;
In books, you cannot will the won’t.
So my books live in harmony.
They speak high heat, but when I read
slow
Then their labored pages pause
And their stilted drama thins,
withdraws.
So I’m hungry, and that's good:
We’re only hungry when we know
What we want. Otherwise
We’re just red-lidded, with distant
eyes.
The First
Piano Lesson
– 2 December 2010
The cat is almost in the floor, softer
than
The carpet, luke-warm, golden-gray –
Wednesday mist.
Almost just a draft, I come through the
door,
Lighter than a child. I lose my fists
Inside, where pined air slows, where
the cat’s curr calms.
She comes in – slight and
tissue-skinned – then glides
Across piano keys in string-hammer
psalms.
I tip-toe a scale, my lids low; she
slides in,
Rum-smooth on fingertips, spit in her
tone:
“Ta-tee, ta-tee…” – Should I
dance like her, then?
Pressing wavelike through keys,
cracking white/black bones
Into sound? Strange new notes can make
babes of men.
She guides my arm: what work such grace
demands.
I think of you (a child once) –
these hands that touched your hands.
“The
Vortex” (a man unplugged)
– 4 May 2010
Forget nothing: no thing is nothing.
Absence is massive; a lack is still
something:
These comma-baled zeroes, a cash
architecture;
That one-time event, a memorial
specter;
These losses, this failure, some space
for ascension;
That God unperceived, still a sentient
intention;
My blindness in sleeping, a primal
distilling;
Our ended discussion, some shift in my willing;
That hollow fluorescence, a small
charge extended;
Your comatose mind, just a wheel
suspended;
Her gnawed candy necklace, a cord for
collection;
This choice without option, more fuel
that direction;
That space in the outlet, a free maiden
waiting;
That flat-lined oscilloscope, rests
procreating.
This 'nothing' – a concept that
persists all on credit –
Should be weightless to carry
(remember: forget it).
I was drawn to this poem immediately after reading the first line. The statement “no thing is nothing” I viewed as a declaration that there is no such thing as “nothing” because even to be lacking is still something. By stating “absence is massive” (2), illustrates that when something does not exist, because it is not bound to any specificity of existence, it’s absence is then limitless and must then be defined then as something. By referring to loss and failure, both are commonly seen as negative downfalls and could therefore be viewed as having nothing beneficial about them, however by speaking towards their “space for ascension” (6) illuminates that even loss leaves possibility for growth. There is in fact always something to be gained from both loss and failure. Even when something is perceived as finished or terminated, there is still something left to be found. Similarly, ended discussions never truly end. Even after two people have both finished speaking aloud, there is still room for “shift in [one’s] willing” (8), as the mind continues to reflect on the conversation that just took place. Though the conversation may appear to be over, the participants could remain pondering the subject of conversation and change their opinions, or they could pick up the conversation later and continue their discussion. The imagery of a gnawed candy necklace not only refutes the possibility of the term nothing, but also demonstrates that there is meaning in everything, even unexpected places. The candy is often viewed as the valuable treasure in a candy necklace. However, by adding the phrase “a cord for collection” (11), shows that even what most would perceive as trash, as “nothing”, can still have meaning and purpose. The last line of the poem uses parentheses to state “remember: forget it” (16). The use of parenthesis implies a hidden meaning, added information. “Nothing” is often a word void of meaning, however the poem reminds that there is always something more. Similar to how there was more to a conversation than is just spoken aloud, and similar to how there is more to a candy necklace than just a string, there is more to everything in life. Nothing does not exist, because there is always something more to be found. The title also uses parentheses to add information. Instead of the tile simply being “The Vortex,” the phrase “a man unplugged” is added in parentheses to demonstrate that most men believe in the concept of nothing, and are unaware of their ignorance. They fall trapped to this “vortex” of nothingness, and are unaware of all the possibilities that arise if one choses to look and to find something out of nothing. The phrase “remember: forget it” is paradoxical just as “nothing is something” is paradoxical. One can’t truly forget, because to forget would result in the absence of a thought, and as the poem illustrates, absence is indeed something. This last line connects back to the first line of the poem with the message that nothing is something, and therefore has value.
ReplyDeleteSure thing, Kalena -- now, what does that mean for you? That's the real question ... (else the poem really is just about nothing ;)
DeleteI was interested in this poem just by the title, “Red Flags”. It was appealing to me because it can be interpreted in many different ways. When I think of a red flag I think of a symbol that represents something dangerous or off limits. While reading the poem I conclude that someone finds interest in this woman, which leads them to scroll through her profile. This act alone hints that the woman is attracting to the viewer and she may be dangerous or the person whom is looking through the profile is greatly interested in her in a suspicious way. When I think of profile I get the sense that this is an idea that someone is thinking at the moment or a belief one stands strongly for. This woman’s status can have many different meanings such as the difficulty one may face when dealing with life’s struggles, yet overcoming them with mental or physical strength. When the viewer describes the interpretation of her profile I agree with the idea formed that her life is “cruel constantly” to show life is a constant struggle and her strong belief in this statement, and through strength she is able to overcome these struggles. However, the hesitation to give input to the woman comes off to me as a lack of confidence when expressing the view upon life and her statement. There is also an assumption that the woman will not understand her agony, which can never be known if not acted upon. Clearly the viewer understands that by her not expressing her life as a delightful place reveals her standard of life as ignorant. Yet the lack of willingness to come forward and communicate with her shows us that the true “Red Flags” is when one is unable to express their emotions due to an assumption or unwillingness to try.
ReplyDeleteYour poem, “The Vortex” really stood out to me and I admire it very much. I have gone back and read it numerous times, and each time something different has grasped me. At first, I was caught by the first two lines, “Forget nothing: no thing is nothing./Absence is massive; a lack is still something:” (lines 1-2). From this I took that you can never just simply forget about something and move on because even nothing is something and it can affect you in many different ways. Also, after reading these first two lines for the first time, I felt like this was foreshadowing to the rest of the poem being about someone leaving and although you tried to pretend like it was nothing, their absence left a huge whole in you. Then in the second stanza it seemed like no matter what you do you can’t just simply forget about it and move on. Then I felt that in line 7, when you said, “My blindness in sleeping…” that you were finally going to stop ignoring the hole in you and stop pretending like you couldn’t see it the whole time. Also, in line 11, “Her gnawed candy necklace, a cord for collection;” I felt as if you were trying to say that it may all be gone but there is still a little part that remains and will never go away. Finally, the last lines in the last stanza seem to reiterate the fact that ‘nothing’ is never just ‘nothing,’ because if it were actually ‘nothing,’ then it wouldn’t weigh down on you every day.
ReplyDeleteThe whole poem is XCUs of one bigger scene -- if you go back again, see if you can see it ...
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ReplyDelete“Girls as Roommates” stood out to me because I was curious about your experience with a girl as a roommate. I was not sure if you literally experienced having a girl as a roommate and the poem was a description of your reactions to her, or if the whole thing was an analogy to women in general. The first line is interesting because of the description of women having the ability to “de-claw” you. I perceived this as women being able to take out the aggression in yourself and strip you of any dominance, and how women make you feel vulnerable because your source of power is taken from you. I thought the line was relatable because I feel like I am able to bring out the more sensitive sides of my male friends, even those who would normally be afraid to expose that part of them. Its interesting because men can view it as women taking something away from them, but it can also be viewed as being able to display something hidden. When you wrote “never Realize your silence is not judging them,” I found it somewhat humorous because it’s something I find myself guilty for at times. I interpreted the line as women being over sensitive and over reacting whenever men do not respond to them in a timely matter, or even at all. There have been multiple times in my life when I have felt as if someone was judging me simply based on their silence directed towards me, therefore illuminating the stance that women are paranoid. The phrases “Women laugh to prove communion” and “then sigh in union” are great characterizations of how women behave around each other. When we are together, the best thing we can do in each others presence is to laugh. Then we sigh in union because along with wanting to be happy together, we want to be sad together as well. It’s comforting knowing that someone else is experiences the hardships that you are. I found “They use each other’s eyes as mirrors” to be extremely powerful. I found this to mean that women are too caught up in the competition they see in every other women, that they are no longer able to focus on themselves. Women base their physical goals off what others look like, they aren’t able to see themselves, they are only able to see what part of themselves reside in other women, or which parts are missing. I interpreted the last stanza as a concluding statement about women that sums up your stance on them. I saw it as, women aren’t all different than men, we may gossip about each other and are overly sensitive to certain situations, but the essential parts of life are similar to mens. I thought that “You may not be struck, but you will be blown” was womens impact on men. Women can affect men to certain extents, skew parts of their being in certain situations, but in the end, men stay men, and women stay women. I thought the line can also mean something more literal, as in women probably won’t physically leave a mark on men, but they can definitely impact them emotionally.
ReplyDeleteIm in a PhD program that's 95% women ... that enough to never want more than one girl roommate.
Delete“Girls as Roommates” stood out to me as a form of social commentary on how women have interacted since the dawn of time. The line, “women laugh to prove communion” touches on women’s constant need to feel connection and attention from others as if attention can feed at how they vision themselves. Laughter is a universal form of connection, but the use of laughter here points out how women try to do anything to desperately feel as part of a group. In stanza three the last line, “They use eachothers eyes as mirrors” comments on how girls constantly change themselves in order to please others. The ability to look into other girls eyes to try to detect judgement and adjust themselves to satisfy others. The unfortunate nature of girls has become to view themselves as others view them creating a codependence between themselves and societal thoughts. However, despite this constant judgment girls band together like “brothers”, and hold grudges rather than start fights in time of conflict. Ultimately, the poem was a very raw insight into the mind of women from an outsider.
ReplyDeleteWho you calling an outsider? Man, when you're in a graduate program in education, you are INside a woman's world ... peer-wise ...
Delete“Ions at the Crest” immediately stood out to me because of title; ions symbolizing a form of imbalance, whether it be positive or negative. The “crest” could resemble a fine line between one side and another, with this imbalanced ion resting perfectly between the two. The poem begins with energy: the speaker is full of hope, and this vitality surges through his veins, so much so that his actions are nearly uncontrollable by his own conscious thoughts. In line 3, which the speaker says “I am a crash-in-waiting, I am a coil unwound,” images of potential energy parallel the speakers emotions (possibly anxiety), which is followed by an image of a runner bolting on gunshot in line 4, showing the built up energy shooting forward in motion. The first line of the second stanza contrasts to the first in that the speaker says “I do not know what “lightning” is. I only know you/me”, but the first stanza fabricates images of lightning and electrical currents in motion. This is where readers first see the extended metaphor of energy and its flow compared to attraction and passion. As the speaker makes his ascent to “the peak” in line 8, he realizes his vulnerability but does not turn back, capturing the chase for affection. The last stanza meshes natural imagery with the speaker and the person whom he’s affectionate for, as the speaker views his person as “cool and covered in a static droplet brine.” The last couplet compares the woman (or possibly man, never explicitly stated) as a crackling thunder cloud, high above the speaker. The speaker, on the other hand, is the “field below”, waiting for rain and at the will of the one he wants (lacking control). The approach to this extended metaphor is very interesting and beautifully executed, as the emotions of the chase are encapsulated clearly with comparisons to electrical energy, ions, ascending mountains, and dry fields awaiting rainfall from the dark clouds above.
ReplyDelete"a runner bolting on gunshot ... " doesn't fit the extended metaphor, and also isn't in the poem: A "runner bolt" is the beginning part of lightning that moves from the ground up (rather than the sky-down, as we conventionally perceive it).
DeleteThank you for the clarification. The lightning image makes a lot more sense in that context.
DeleteBesides the runner-bolt misconception, is my analysis close to what you were trying to portray through your poem? Or is there far more to it than meets my eye?
DeleteYes, I'd say you were pretty much on-the-ball with your reading.
DeleteIn my personal dictionary (the one in my head, where words and their definitions are idiosyncratically mine), I like to define LOVE as "gravity minus weight" ... that kind of attraction that transcends the downward, the time-constrained, or the negative.
That's what this poem is trying to convey. When you're drawn to someone -- really drawn to them -- it fills you up. Whether they reciprocate or not, still you crackle with that energy.
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ReplyDeleteAs I was reading through your poems, “The First Piano Lesson” caught my attention due to its peculiar title and the fact that the first line involves a cat, which isn’t usually associated with a piano lesson. Intrigued, I kept reading, especially enjoying phrases such as, “Strange new notes can make babes of men” (12). Regarding the meaning behind the poem, I gathered that the cat that you reference symbolizes some person, most likely female, that has had a significant impact on your life. She is able to change you in a way that makes you graceful and youthful. She, just like a cat, has a soft presence and is almost mesmerizing in way. I really enjoyed how you utilized many references to children because it illuminates the innocence and easy go-with-the-flow lifestyle of adolescents. When this female is with you, she allows you to once again enter that state of innocence and forget about external problems, just like when you say, “She guides my arm: what work such grace demands. I think of you (a child once) - these hands that touched your hands” (13-14). Furthermore, the word-choice you use, like “glides” and “wavelike” evoke the relaxed and calming mood that you enter when around this female.
ReplyDeleteThis is about my female piano-teacher, giving me a piano lesson. Her cat has since died.
DeleteSometimes (more often than not, I'd say) things are what they are.
Anyone who writes in metaphors more than descriptions is in danger of losing touch with the world that nurtures them.
When I began reading “Ions at the Crest” I was hooked on the first line. I find it really interesting in saying “eyes filled with hope” because to me, usually when I see eyes filled with something I immediately think of tears; which have both a negative and positive connotation although most including myself think of tears having a negative connotation. However, saying your eyes were filled with hope makes me think of the negative aspect that comes with hope of having hope but being disappointed with the outcome or what happens afterwards which I believe is what you’re touching on when you say “I know this means a fall”. The juxtaposition in the description of the speaker and love resonates as to the person chasing love is constantly thinking about it, always trying to make an effort, full of hope, but the imagery of the speakers love being “cool” and “static” as well as its location being in a location that seems like heaven to me shows that speakers desire for love and that maybe at the present it might be unobtainable or they have yet to reach it.
ReplyDeleteTears aren't such a sad image to me -- overwhelmed. yes. Necessarily sad, no. Definitely not in this poem: this is about the positive energy of hope.
DeleteI was intrigued by "Red Flags" because the title brings attention to the poem because a red flag is something you are immediately drawn to. I think this poem speaks to the technology that has replaced human interaction, but also the sense of entitlement the generation that mainly uses technology has. This poem comments on the flaws of online dating, and the facades that come with it. An online dating profile becomes almost like a resume for people to describe their qualities. This is not the whole truth, but instead just perceptions of how people see themselves. This idea is emphasized by her thinking her life is hard; when in reality her obstacles are obsolete. The response to her complaining may be that she is “fine”, because she is in a position to use technology to enhance her life. If that is the case then she has no extremely serious issues at hand. This comments on people who complain about things that are not really issues, and those who refuse to admit that there is brightness in their life. Instead of accepting happiness and joy in life, even when things are difficult, they continue to complain. If they accept this reality they are vain because they are complaining about things that are not really issues. Technology has made many aspects of life easier and therefore people should not complain about things that are not crucial.
ReplyDeleteWhen reading through your poems, “The First Piano Lesson” caught my attention because of the sharp contrast between its dreamlike imagery and the nihilistic tone of “The Vortex.” The poem seems to reflect the natural course of aging, as exemplified by the breaks. In the first stanza, the narrator seems wide-eyed and innocent, observing his surroundings before becoming captivated by his instructor. The second stanza can be assumed to represent adulthood since it closes with “[. . .] Strange new notes can make babes of men” (12). This indicates that the narrator has reached an age of maturity, yet the instructor’s playing makes him nostalgic of his childhood. Finally, the third stanza reveals a state of old age, as the imagery of “She guides my arm” (13) and his reflecting on how the piano instructor was “(a child once)” (14) are behaviors characteristic of the elderly. Similarly, the first stanza is significantly longer than the others, perhaps mirroring children's tendency to rush through life without pausing to reflect on its value. The second stanza is only two lines shorter than the first, indicating adults’ increased ability to recognize the importance of enjoying life’s experiences; however, adults are generally still focused on getting through their lives just to achieve their next goals. Lastly, the final stanza is only two lines long, indicating the elderly’s inclination to ruminate on life as a whole, simply wishing for more time when they were younger because they now realize the importance of appreciating every second. Overall, the poem seems to be freezing a moment of time precious to the narrator in order to understand its full value. This is evidenced by the careful attention to detailed imagery and description.
ReplyDeleteOR -- the dude's taking his first piano lesson and it makes him feel like a child again.
DeleteThis poem, “Books Versus Heartaches” attracts my attention because reading books and heartaches are both very distressing and engaging topics depending on the circumstance. I wanted to know if a book created this heartache or perhaps the book reminded you of what a heartache might portray. In the line 1, “My books are dead I see” produced an image of a stack of books that are used for decoration rather than actually read, therefore lifeless. In my mind this could also be referring to a relationship that is dull. However the transition to how the books are in unity with each other and alive when it is read as for love can blossom when true effort is put in. Often times when I am reading a book I need to read over it more than once in order to really understand the context and meaning. In the description of the, “labored pages pause” (line 7) reminds me of times I am forced to read something I don’t necessarily want to and or is assigned as a homework but must in order to understand the assignment. As for when I think of labor of one who works for their benefit whether if it’s for money, knowledge, or simply to retain something.The details of the words “speak high heat” (line 6) creates a powerful statement of suspenseful text. The idea that when reading rapidly just as a fire would catch onto something furiously, rather than slowly can creates a fierce yet dull sentiment. I noticed how in each stanza there is a focus on different ideas yet towards the last stanza there is a transition. This commonly portrayed as I read and it often leads to other actions than reading. In the last stanza there is a focus on the appetite of food, expressed in lines 10 and 11, “We’re only hungry when we know / What we want” which I interpreted as a crave for things or people in our life that we don't have or want. As for this line food is a distraction and realization that what is want is known even know we might not have in our possession.This also goes back to the first stanza in which you were told not to do something, “I asked and she said “Don’t”’ to better emphasize how in life we know what we want and for the expression showed but denied can be an example of this. This poem was very interesting and made me focus many different regarding love, literature and the way the two can be colliding yet similar.
ReplyDelete"My books are dead I see" was meant to be taken literally: they have no life in them but what we give to them -- this gives us some control, but also makes them, in the end, unreal (not satiating, still leaving us hungry).
DeleteI’m a die-hard for cute romance stories and I have to say that this is one of the first poems I have ever read that makes me “ooh” and “awe”. The simplicity of the diction and structure of the poem allows the story to flow. Repeating the first stanza at the very end makes the story seem cyclical, like a life cycle of love. The rhyming pattern of “Hold” contributes to the overall sing-song tone and calming melody. I found it interesting that the initial two lines of the poem focused on something so pessimistic as the inescapable ending of us all: death. Then, the following two lines were the complete opposite, and rather gave off a message of hope. Preaching the importance of compassion and finding genuine love in life, this poem resonates closely to my heart. When the girl takes time to escape from her daily stresses and gets to enjoy a simple carnival and when the boy looks into her eyes and calls her an “angel”, you can’t help but feel like love is the epitome of life. Time stops when there is that passion in those eyes.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you liked it. Hang on to that romantic spirit -- provided you balance it with honesty, it will always help you to see the beauty in life that others find hard to notice.
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ReplyDeleteThe poem “Books Versus Heartaches” initially struck me in line four when it reads, “In books, you cannot will the won’t”. Seeing as the narrator previously referred to books as “dead”, line four means that one cannot force another to understand the meaning of a book or the people who don’t want to understand. Or perhaps it means that one cannot search for something in a book that is not there; searching for extraneous symbolism or trying to change the path/final destination of a character is impossible in books. Despite the intended meaning, line four stands out as a truly provocative and enthralling statement. The next stanza states that books’ “stilted drama thins, withdraws”(8) when the narrator reads books slowly. The narrator is recognizing that books become less stiff, both literally and metaphorically, as a person truly reads and understands the piece. Finally, the last stanza clearly connects to heartache by mentioning hunger. Without hunger, pain and desire an individual would simply have “distant eyes”. Books offer familiar comfort whereas heartache is simply familiar.
ReplyDelete"In books [as opposed to heartaches], you cannot will the won't..."
DeleteI was interested by your poem “Ions at the Crest”. The title gives the impression of instability and uncertainty on “the Crest” or the edge. One could either fall over the edge of go back to solid ground. I noticed the stanzas changed emotion as the poem progressed. The first stanza seems to portray that the speaker is full of hope and possibilities. The speaker is charged with so much potential energy and “filled so high with hope that it’s dangerous to drive” which suggests that there is no going back because the energy needs to go somewhere before there is a crash. The second stanza, the speaker seems to convey that his intense energy and hope from being in love. The speaker says, “I’m rising and I’m rising up (I know this means a fall- “ and this shows the excitement and uncertainty that comes from falling in love. There is a sense a heightened sense of power that is out of control and the speaker says, “I can’t retract or stall”. This conveys the imagery of a car that cannot stall or stop, but is hurtling down a road and will continue down its path until it crashes. This contrasts the hope the speaker has as the speaker seems to be waiting for something to go wrong in the new relationship. The third stanza suggests that the speaker is fully committing to the relationship and prepared for any consequences. The speaker says, “I draw in from the edges here, working toward your current line” which gives the imagery of stepping off the safety of the sidelines and going towards the center of the field. The speakers seems to have come to acceptance of his fear of the future and knows that there there is no going back, only forward. The poem ends with “Who break for you so many times you’ll never even know”. This conveys a sense of resignation to the lack of control the speaker has over his situation and ends on a calmer note, like the emotional lightning storm has come to an end.
ReplyDelete" the speaker says, “I can’t retract or stall”. This conveys the imagery of a car that cannot stall or stop, but is hurtling down a road and will continue down its path until it crashes" ...
DeleteHow would a car 'retract'? The poem is an extended metaphor. All language is subsumed within that twin-image (the man experiencing love as the ground does lightning).
Looking through your poems, this one really caught my eye. For some reason, although short in length and in a seemingly simple structure, “Eaten” was unusually hard for me to comprehend. Possibly wrong, I interpreted this as a boy’s ungratefulness for food and inability to comprehend when others kept “shoving” down these words of gratefulness down his throat, like food itself. The first line of each stanza is an action verb and the fact that the first line is only one word, implies there is a strong meaning behind these powerful words. I realized the first line of each stanza progresses in its meaning, paralleling with the boy’s eventual comprehension of being grateful. Starting with “found” like how the boy is only focused on finding and then eating the food, then with “still i” to show some hesitation, and then ending with “cherish” to signify his realization: food is scarce and it is important that we all treasure its presence whenever possible. I also noticed that all lines (except one) are end-stopped to show that this poem needs many breaks to think and ponder. Instead of rushing through the poem, it is important for the reader to “digest” (haha like digesting food) each line and its role in the transformation throughout the poem until the end.
ReplyDeletePerhaps the spur for this poem will help to clarify its meaning:
DeleteTerry Gross – “Can you share some of your favorite comments from readers that you've gotten over the years?” Maurice Sendak – “Oh, there's so many. Can I give you just one that I really like? It was from a little boy. He sent me a charming card with a little drawing. I loved it. I answer all my children's letters—sometimes very hastily—but this one I lingered over. I sent him a postcard and I drew a picture of a Wild Thing on it. I wrote, 'Dear Jim, I loved your card.' Then I got a letter back from his mother and
she said, 'Jim loved your card so much he ate it.' That to me was one of the highest compliments I've ever received. He didn't care that it was an original drawing or anything. He saw it, he loved it, he ate it.” (NPR interview.)
The message behind “Hold” is one that I strive to live by each day. I believe the poem illuminates how we should live like we’re dying; the first and last stanzas imply that you only have so much time on this earth, so you might as well cherish the moments experienced with others before they are taken away from you. You mention to “hold someone,” but I also believe it references the fact that people should hold not only hold onto just people, but to memories, moments, and opportunities, as well. Furthermore, I enjoy how you incorporate two different stories that join together, one from the “girl downtown” (9) and the other from the “booth boy” (13). The girl, living a hectic, fast-paced lifestyle, finally slows down as she sits to watch the ships on the pier. As she unwinds, she is able to meet the boy with “nice arms.” From here, I enjoy how the story between the two of them ends, allowing the reader to interpret what happens next. But ultimately, that newfound relationship between the boy and girl references the message of finding someone to hold onto and love because life can be over in an instant. Overall, I really enjoyed the ideas behind this poem, and I believe that everyone should follow this message.
ReplyDelete" You mention to “hold someone,” but I also believe it references the fact that people should hold not only hold onto just people, but to memories, moments, and opportunities, as well." -- Nope, not in this poem; this is specifically about finding connections with other living beings in this world.
DeleteI'm glad that you try to live in accordance with that sentiment; I believe that it will serve you well.
I noticed the simple rhyme scheme used in the poem “My Terminable Will” ABAB CDCD EFEF and tried to correlate its relevance to the meaning of the poem. I concluded that life is simple and death is inevitable, but Earth continues to follow its course without any interruptions or abrupt stops. At the beginning of the poem, I perceived that nature had an inevitable end just like humans, but the last two lines made me create a new conclusion. The water will always rush just like nature will always continue its numerous different cycles of life. I am definitely transported to a different setting when reading “My Terminable Will”, as I feel all my five senses fully engaged. The rich imagery allows me to feel entranced by a dense forest near the shoreline and close to a snow-top mountain with dew on my arms when I read the poem. By analyzing the title, I don’t know if I should assume the person is debating if he/she should end his/her life since he/she has control of his/her willpower or if I should assume this is just a generalization about the inevitability of death. I want to be optimistic and see this as a sign that life continues after death (given the constant flow of water ending in the last two lines) but at the same time I realize that the richness that life offers is only temporary since we all end up lifeless. What was your initial intention of this poem? Do you believe in a life after death or do you believe everything dies with you when you reach death in the cycle of life? Is nature different or the same in that way?
ReplyDeleteI definitely wouldn't encourage the view that {{one will eventually die, so one might as well die now}} ... that is a rashly reductive argument, on par with "everything eaten becomes shit, so I might as well eat shit."
DeleteThis poem also isn't addressing the broad issue of life-after-death, but rather a part of it: the communicable presence of one's will, one's ability to explain personal intentions to those who don't understand. That specific ability -- the one that I am using now, to clarify this poem for you -- dies when the person/author/artist dies. But other people, writing and creating with similar energy about the same universal stimuli, will continue to rush -- and that is of some (even considerable) consolation.
When reading "Books Versus Heartaches," I found that the speaker had recently been through a breakup, or something that would cause him to be heartbroken. In the stages of heartache, there is the initial pain, then a reflective period over the cause of the pain. This seems to be what the speaker is doing in this poem. He compares and contrasts the turbulent nature of relationships to the static nature of books, as once books are printed they cannot be easily changed. The speaker says his “books are dead” (1) which I take to mean that the speaker has already read them; therefore the story they hold has no more meaning for him since he has digested the content. He goes on to state that although the reader may wish for an alternate ending, the books are already written, comfortable in their unchanging nature. For this reason, his “books live in harmony” (5). Alternately, relationships’ courses may be altered by minute actions, forever shifting and adapting based on the emotions of the people involved. This means that this is the opposite of books, where one "cannot will the won't" (4).
ReplyDeleteWell-read.
Delete“Ions at the Crest” is filled to the brim with energy, so much so that reading it in itself evokes a sense of electricity in the reader. This allows the reader to be able to have a significant connection with the emotions described within the poem. The speaker initially states that his “eyes are filled so high with hope that it’s dangerous to drive,” and in this comparison to not being able to drive when under the influence, he is implying that he is intoxicated with emotion to the point where he cannot see straight. He continues with this metaphor in stating that he is “a crash-in-waiting,” emphasizing the fact that his emotions are running so high at the moment that he barely has control over himself, physically and emotionally. The electricity-themed diction remains constant throughout, the first stanza alone containing phrases such as “coil unwound” and “crackling runner-bolt.” The speaker continues by stating that he “[does] not know what ‘lightning’ is” and that he only knows “you/me,” which implies that the strong “intoxication” of sorts that he is experiencing is a direct result of a relationship of his with another person. In comparing this relationship to lightning -- or, stating that its intensity is beyond that of lightning -- he is able to convey the degree to which he has been affected by this relationship. The relationship in itself is a “silver magnet,” but “without [its] gravity,” in the sense that the electricity is consuming him in only a positive way, with no end or fall in sight -- for now. He continues by acknowledging that “this means a fall,” stating that he is still grounded to a certain extent; he is not foolish enough to believe that the perfection of this relationship will not be constant forever, but he is allowing himself to enjoy it by living in the moment because it is what he has right now.
ReplyDeleteAt a first glance, I assumed your poem “Theory” would be of a cold and mechanical nature, completely contradicting what is often associated with the spontaneity and unassuming nature of love. Love, however, can be a roller coaster of emotions, which the speaker attempts to make extremely obvious. One moment, a person can be holding the one they love in their arms and the next the weight of the world is on each lover’s shoulders. From one stanza to the next, there is a physical distance, which illustrates the speaker’s growing distance from the one he truly loves and desires. This is, of course, all just a theory in the eyes of the speaker. Though the speaker views his potential shared kiss as “clearing and guiltless” (5), he does not consider other factors that may affect his relationship with the one he believes he loves. He grows increasingly more resentful as he understands that this love will be hindered by the coldness and betrayal of his partner. Whereas the beginning of the poem illustrates optimism and beauty in the essence of love, there is a growing amount of pessimism exhibited by the speaker, as he is instantly crushed by his partner’s decision to not love back. He even addresses the fact that they “were wrong-paired, served a hard spike back at my soul” (16-18). A love that was originally so beautiful and harmless has transitioned into being cold and stiff, incapable of finding its way back to the way it was. And although the speaker feels like he can be hurt, he still desires that love to return to him in one last attempt to discover eternal love.
ReplyDeleteNot really how I meant it, though I can see how you took it that way.
DeleteImagine you've lost someone: imagine that grief, that heart-ache, and the process that you go though in accepting it ... you get angry, you raise your hands, you almost wish you had never started the relationship just so you could avoid the pain and loss you feel now. And then, in the end, you just accept that you loved them, and you wouldn't have done anything differently.
The speaker here is walking through all of that hard reality in his imagination, and with acceptance saying: "Yes, I still want that. As more than theory."
Thank you! I really appreciate your input. And now that you mention it, I can definitely understand the process involved in a relationship
DeleteIf there is one thing in life that I have learned, it’s that living with a little modesty is not such a bad thing. “Self-reporting” instantly grabbed my attention because too often we lead ourselves blindly down a path engulfed by egotism and narcissism, assuming that the things we are doing are beneficial in our individual journeys. The speaker lacks the ability to see the world in a new light, a light that may contradict his personal beliefs and stances, and refuses to be vulnerable to his own mistakes (which the speaker doesn’t technically consider a fault or mistake). This isn’t to say that the speaker is incapable of seeing the world differently; however, he is too stubborn to accept varying viewpoints as to what is wrong and what is right. This stubbornness is revealed when the speaker believes what he says is always correct, as he states, “And I’ll always make sense, / provided you can follow along” (7-8). Though the speaker leads himself blindly down a path of self-righteousness, he cannot understand why it is so difficult for others to understand him. For one, the speaker does not recognize that his attitude is completely one-sided, which is why so many others do not follow in his moral footsteps. The speaker refers to himself as a “man”, but rather acts more like an immature and pompous child who is deprived of reason and drowns in his own self-interest. I especially enjoy the part where the man does not understand why more girls do not respond to his messages, and doesn’t see how his aggressive personality is off-putting.
ReplyDeleteBeing a passionate piano player myself, “The First Piano Lesson” immediately captured my attention, as I reminisce about the first day I let my hands glide across that baby grand piano. Just as depicted in your poem, the event of my first piano lesson was less about the formation of brilliant chords and complex notes. Instead, it was about the atmosphere that surrounded me. A cat is the first use of imagery in the poem, and suggest that the speaker remembers more about the atmosphere rather than what the lesson actually entailed. Though a cat may just be a cat in this poem, the use of the animal allow the reader to question how the cat may have made the speaker feel during his first piano lesson. The cat, a creature renowned for having graceful and mysterious qualities, can be connected to similar characteristics associated with the piano. Similarly, the cat’s mysteriously alluring qualities can be compared to the ingrained memory of the speaker’s first lesson. It is less about the actual cat than the characteristics of the cat. But still, it is just a cat. The introduction of the piano teacher suggest interrelated characteristics of grace as “She comes in-slight and tissue skinned- then glides/ Across the piano keys in string-hammer psalms” (6-7). Not only can the piano teacher be so graceful on the piano, but her frailty make her performance that much more special, especially considering that it is the first piano lesson. Perhaps that is what allows the speaker to recall such a memory.
ReplyDeleteI found “My Terminable Will” to be very fascinating because it suggests that there will be an inevitable and unavoidable moment in time where creativity will die just as nature often does. Though the creative nature of the speaker has provided beauty to the world (just as nature has), there comes a time when even the most beautiful works must come to an abrupt stop. “There will be no more snow on the mountain” (2) symbolizes the inescapable essence of creativity’s death. When the author of a work dies, they not only give up their ability to explain to the world what they were trying to portray but are also sacrificing their ability to express their individual thought processes and interpretation of the world around them. Once their creativity and physical body is gone, they are no longer capable of explaining their individual views and opinions to those who did not understand their intentions. The detailed use of imagery, including the shoreline and intricate depictions of forest and green colors, suggest a world that is universally stunning but not universally understood. Just like the beauty found in nature, a work of art created by an individual cannot be rushed or the purpose of its creation will be pointless. The same concept applies for those who search for creativity but cannot always find what they are looking for.
ReplyDelete... So what would the moral be? (For me, I think it's something like:
DeleteDon't be obtuse and cryptic unless you have to be --
someday you will be in a crypt, and what no one has seen yet, they might never see.)
I’ve always thought that it’s interesting to think about whether certain things -- emotions, people, our surroundings -- actually are what they are, are what they seem to be. “The Vortex” is one of those works that made me stop and think for a very long time, about what “being” means. There are so many things that we, as individuals, think about or worry about too much, and often times whatever we’re worrying about is not something but is rather a lack of something. But a lack of something is not nothing -- it is something, because we are thinking about lacking it, and this is having an effect on us. I also think the contradictions that are used in this poem make it more powerful and enhance its impact on the reader -- “absence is massive,” “(remember: forget it),” etc.
ReplyDeleteIt’s hard to make sense of these things because this poem makes me think about everything and existence so much, so I’m sorry if my rambling didn’t make much sense. I really enjoyed this poem; poems that make me stop and think in the way that this one did are my favorite kind.
“Ions at the Crest” is a really interesting take on a love poem, because I find the electricity metaphor extremely accurate in describing the bond that lovers share. The adrenaline found at the height of love is like electricity, untamed and powerful, yet awe-inspiring at the same time. Despite the inevitable fall off from the high, at it’s peak there’s no turning back, consequences be damned.
ReplyDeleteThe poem “Books Versus Heartaches” interested me on many levels. From my understanding, the speaker is comparing the “matter of fact” way in which a books are read and written to that of a heartbreak. The speaker is reading a captivating book and he tries to manipulate the pacing of how he reads them to prevent the inevitable written in ending. This poem resonates well with me because in the past I have wanted to change things I have no control over. Much like the speaker, I have tried to, “will the won’t” and the results have been futile. The speaker relates the motions of a heartache to that of reading a book, slow with draws in and out of consciousness. Although I have never been heartbroken, I have seen the effects if someone who was, and it was much like a reader slowly disengaging himself from a book.
ReplyDeleteThis poem made me a little uneasy. There was a lot of motion and ideas happening all at once each stanza. The concept of arbitrary nothingness was apparent, but the overall theme and motive was a little unclear. I like the first stanza in which the speaker states “Forget nothing: no thing is nothing.Absence is massive; a lack is still something”. As humans we only see the “something” and so many times we forget that the “nothingness” is actually a thing.
ReplyDelete"Ions at the Crest"
ReplyDeleteThe life and vivacity that fills the beginning stanza of this poem initially drew me in. I am not sure why, but it made me feel nostalgic and maybe a little bit sad as it reminded me of a time when I was quite literally the electric, energetic person that the poem describes. I thought that I had all the power in the world flowing through me and that anything was possible. Some people may describe that as a loose cannon but I would say that the excitement was just difficult to control. The second stanza pulls you back to reality and I can directly relate it to when I finally learned the hard way that the higher up you go, the farther you have to fall. Having something and then having it taken away is so much more painful than not having something to begin with. Therefore, when one is held back by the chains of anxious overthinking, the joy of rising and accomplishing is tainted by the devilish voice in your head that reminds you of your fear of failure. The last stanza truly resonates with where I am now. The electricity has seemed to be turned off or tuned down and it’s almost glazed over. Life is a little less bright and there’s a layer of protective film. Besides, the fact that the lover is the “crackling cloud-dome” and that the speaker is the “field below” makes the change in dynamic clear. Gone are the days of spontaneous sparks and energy but instead it is replaced with the tired resignation of a constant pain to endure. All in all, I believe it sums up the degrading effect that romance can have on a person and how you cannot always please everyone.
I didn't think those elements were visible in this poem-- which makes me more impressed that you find them there, because I definitely think the ecstatic > fearful > jaded aspect was part of the life-context that this poem came out of. Good on you and your X-ray vision: thanks for reminding me that I'm not alone in the way I experience this world :) Hope you find that mutually reassuring.
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