I'm an Olympic-level hugger,
Usually average an 8.5.
But I fumbled you yesterday, a 3!
And I think that I know why:
Performance is half preparation;
The other half, presence-of-mind.
And I didn't know we'd be hugging;
Plus I'm weak at this 'Casual bind'.
See, my handicap is, I like you.
It trips me up when “Let's be
friends”
Turns to falling in your eyes over
table-tops
And taming butterflies in my head.
Now, of course—no excuses—I
fumbled,
With a weak 'One-armed chin-drape.' So
stiff!
But I promise, next time, a good
'Wrap-squeeze'
Or, if I land right, a 'Flat-palms half-lift.'
At a 7, your skin will feel warmer.
An 8 will make your muscles relax.
At a 9, you'll find yourself smiling.
And a 10 will br-ring chimes up your
back.
As an athlete, I know my own limits:
I won't promise 10's, next we meet.
But, at least,
I'll set stage for a 7.
And then train, all my heart, to
increase.
This poem really resonates with me. I love hugs. Love them. Hugs can cure (at least momentarily) any sadness, I believe. There have been countless times when I've come away from a hug disappointed at myself because it was lackluster and not as fulfilling or comforting as it had the potential to be. I never blame the other person, as the speaker is not blaming the reciprocator of his hug. You get what you give, and a hug is no different. If you show you are comfortable or happy through the feel of a hug, then the other person will return the feeling. The speaker says his "handicap" is his affection towards the reciprocator, and such a thrill made him nervous. As it should, because if a person is not nervous in the presence a potential significant other, then they do not have good intentions. After his weak hug, he strives to be better, and calls himself an olympian of hugging. I wish there were such a thing. This poem is about the love we give and receive, and how we should always strive to show the very excess of what we feel because it will be returned.
ReplyDeleteI don't know how you would score a hug olympics with any sort of objectivity :)
DeleteAt first, I mis-read your sentence as " if a person IS nervous in the presence a potential significant other, then they do not have good intentions" ... I think I agree with that misread version more. Even if it undercuts my supposed moral character as the speaker in this poem ... when you really feel the genuine urge to hug someone--because you feel like both sides want it--there's no reason to be nervous in that moment.
It’s strange how hugs are often categorized as more friendly than a handshake but less intimate than a kiss. I think all three are unspoken forms of communication that are universal across most cultures. Because a hug can mean multiple things and portray different feelings through the pressure and position and length of time etc. I like your comparison of hugging to an Olympic-level sport. Most people have been hugging their whole lives and develop their own style that may agree or disagree with the receiver of the hug - or maybe draw a feeling of indifference or something in between.
ReplyDeleteI have an uncle who has a very unique style of hugging, something everyone in my family has taken note of, one of my aunts in particular. This is what he does: he will bend his knees slightly, which makes is butt stick out, and then make a wide O with his arms and pat you on your back. I think of it as a conservative hug that very much respects the receiver of the hug’s space. There is minimal contact and I suppose since I have had this type of hug all my life I did not think it strange until this one aunt pointed it out. Until that point I had never really considered what goes into hugs and how subjective they are. I think the emotions of the participating parties are the most critical, however. The best hugs I have ever received are from my mom. Our everyday hugs are comforting, but it was in moments when either one of us or both of us needed more comforting than normal that I felt what I believe the ideal hug holds: love, compassion, understanding, and the feeling that you can let go and just be in the moment while also being anchored into reality by the embrace. Anyway, I got off on a tangent. I realized all of this because of my aunt who would always poke fun at my uncle’s style of hugging. She did not do this out of ill-will, but rather, I suppose, the absurdity of it as she is from the other side of the family and they meet about once a year for the holidays. What I’m trying to say is thanks to her jokes, I was able to look at hugging in a new way rather than just accepting it at face value that this is what I should do when I say goodbye to relatives and such.
I could say more, but I think I’ve made this a long enough ramble.
I really enjoyed this :) (Also really appreciated you calling me "I" like another human, instead of "Kuntzman" ... which everyone else is doing this year for some reason?)
DeleteHave you ever tried giving your uncle a big, tight hug? I'd suggest coming in from behind, slightly off to the side--one arm over the far shoulder, one arm under the nearest arm. It's safe and leaves his inner bubble in tact, but it would give him that squeeze that makes the best hugs so medicinal.
Maybe he wouldn't appreciate it. But then again, maybe he just needs someone to open the flood gates :)
The thing that stood out to me about this poem was how much emotion the speaker revealed through his charming overreaction to his hug with his love interest. I felt that since the entire poem revolved around the speaker’s affection towards the person he addresses, his emotions are fully expressed. I also found the mentions of athletes to be very interesting because of how these images suggest physical pain or endurance, demonstrating that obtaining this person’s affection may be difficult or complicated. I also found the use of numbers and similar syntax further conveyed the amount of work and effort that goes into the speaker’s attempts towards his object of affection because of the consistent pattern of the stanzas.
ReplyDeleteI agree that the comparison of hugging to an athletic event truly emphasizes the amount of work and emotion that goes into it, but would like to add that this way of thinking of hugs seems intentionally backwards. A hug is something that one often does not think about -- it is impulsive in the way that one gives a hug when it seems needed without consciously considering specific factors that make up a hug, like an elite athlete would do. Your point that this comparison suggests a pain or endurance really resonated with me when reading this poem because it seems to me for such an innate gesture like a hug to be deconstructed this way suggests a deeper understanding of why they exist. When really thinking about it, they are meant to overcome feelings of anguish or strife that the person who is being hugged is feeling, and thus require finesse and effort if one is to accomplish that.
DeleteThis poem is written about someone with an early crush in a relationship. Starting off with a rating of how good the speaker’s hugs are, the poem progresses to comment on the “butterflies” in his head and how the speaker was bad during this specific hug because he likes the person. This seems like a very modern relationship, as one problem between the two is that there seems to be some sort of romantic relationship, yet there is no label placed on the two. In the modern area these types of relationships are extremely common, especially in high school. I know the feeling of having a crush and being a mess around them, so this poem is very relatable to me and probably most people.
ReplyDelete“Botching a hug…” is an extremely relatable poem that successfully reveals JK’s struggles with love and his insecurities. I find it interesting that JK decided to describe his hugging abilities as “Olympic-level” as it added a clever, playful twist to the poem. Although the feeling of being nervous to approach a crush is common, JK integrates a personal tone to his discussion of the taboo subject. I feel that “Botching a hug…” is very interesting because JK decided to compare love to sports which is uncommon. In addition, his use of numbers creates a pleasing break in the appearance of the poem which I find to be intriguing. The fifth stanza stands out and also serves as an unexpected break in the appearance of the poem.
ReplyDeleteDanielle
I’ve always considered myself a hugger, especially those who grew up with me. Back when I was a younger kid, I went to a K-8 school called WNS (Westside Neighborhood School). They had a very organized system for drop-off, where all the cars would pile in a single file line and the teachers would be there, bright and early the morning, to open the doors and help students out of the car. This system was symbolic of the close community the school had created, instilling that our environment was safe and filled with helpful, loving teachers who acted as mentors to me. Everyday as I would exit the car, I would walk towards the school gate entrance, and along that path, I would hug every single teacher on the way who was standing, opening car doors. To me, I was purley expressing my joy in seeing them, but little did I know that those actions were disguised training to become an Olympic level hugger. I am not always a strong 8.5. I have my off days like everyone else. Sometimes I’ll only use one arm to hug, or even forget to tightly embrace one with my love, but overall, I think my training has paid off.
ReplyDeleteI understand JK as he tells his story of ‘botching a hug’. I often get lazy when I hug my family because I see them everyday, nevertheless it is important. My sister called me out one day for lazily giving her a hug and my mom got mad at me too. JK says that his hug was “with a weak 'One-armed chin-drape.' So stiff!”, and I couldn’t have described my careless hug better.
Truth rings in the statement “At a 7, your skin will feel warmer. An 8 will make your muscles relax. At a 9, you'll find yourself smiling. And a 10 will br-ring chimes up your back”. My mood can be turned around in a single hug, and if it is a good hug, my entire day can be made. Such a mystery how powerful the hug is!
-Olivia Blum
:)
Delete
ReplyDeleteI am the WORST hugger. On your scale, I’d probably rate my hugs a 2. The close bodily contact makes me uncomfortable and usually, I give people a sort of half hug and a pat on the back. I always botch hugs and after, I think about how awkward that hug must’ve been… But I don’t know how to hug. Where do my arms go? Where should my head rest? I guess, as your poem states, it’s a result of not being present; if I was present, our bodies will fit together like a puzzle piece. In your third stanza, you revealed how the hug was difficult because you really liked that person. That same thing happened to me! I went on a date and when he was leaving, I got nervous and just give him the most awkward hug. This stanza was so relatable. I enjoyed who you categorized the different types of hugs. I’ve never had a level 10 hug, but I’ve definitely had at least an 8 — when I was upset about something and my mom came and comforted me. Maybe I should work on hugging so I can find out what a level 10 hug is all about? This caused me to look at a hugs in a new way: though I don’t like hugs and I fear I will never be good at them, hugging is to make someone else feel better, it doesn’t have to make me feel better.
- Kira Levin
"I fear I will never be good at them" ... Fear is a force of division; it undermines a hug. It distracts from the presence that makes the best hugs so powerful and moving. So if you feel performance anxiety about Giving a hug... maybe just focus on being an Olympic-level hug recipient: open your arms and let people come in to you. And then just enjoy it :) Let them handle the squeeze, and you can work on being a pro at savoring that moment.
DeleteI enjoyed how the speaker portrayed himself as a professional athlete. Even in something as simple as hugging can be difficult when it starts to mean something. Usually, you do not think about eating, you just do; but when you go on a date, you become aware and want to look presentable because you really like this person. Something that people do every day is easy until we do them with someone who means the world to us. You become self-conscious but with practice, like the speaker, it is simple to get as good as needed with practice. In stanza one when the speaker is explaining how he usually gives hugs but he made a mistake, he performed poorly, but he is aware of the reason why. Sometimes things take you by surprise, like this hug, and the practice goes out the window. I also enjoyed how the athlete is humble, he knows that he will not be able to give a ten the next time because he understands his limits; however the athlete is also confident in himself, he knows how his hugs will affect the woman. This poem is not just about hugs or practice, but about being conscious of yourself and your actions when in the presence of a loved one. This poem represents, at least to me, the potential that everyone has and can achieve over time. Things happen, surprises occur, and there is nothing you can do about that but know that next time you can do better and be prepared.
ReplyDeleteThroughout this poem I found myself reading with a huge smile across my face as it is so fun to read about someone in love stressing about something as little as a hug. I think this interaction is fun to read because it showcases the intricate thoughts and obsessions of someone experiencing a crush, as this could be describing the interaction of a 9 year boy hugging his first crush for the first time or an elderly person falling for their soulmate. Every person has experienced a crush where they find themselves thinking of every little detail every second of the day, preparing for their interaction with the source of their affection and becoming so nervous that they botch it all. This poem was extremely enjoyable to read as it evoked a sense of love and affection from something as basic as a hug.
ReplyDeleteI also loved the image above the poem as it showcases a variety of hugs from lovers, to mothers and children, to owners and their dogs. I thought this was an interesting decision because the poem seems to focus on a hug between romantic partners, but the power of a hug can be applied to any form of relationship. I am a big hugger and one of my favorite feelings is being hugged by someone I care about. Reading this poem brought me the same warm level of comfort that being embraced brings me and made the experience of reading this alone in my room so much less lonely.
I found this poem very funny and uplifting. The speaker treats hugging as a sport which he takes very seriously. While he prides himself on being a professional hugger, certain people have the ability to mess up his game. Mental game is a critical aspect of all sports, so it makes perfect sense that the speaker would not hug well when he is distracted. Love can be one of the most difficult mental distractions to overcome. It becomes more difficult to think, speak, or act right when you are around a person you have feelings for. While it is easy to get hung up on awkward interactions with someone you like, the speaker uses an athlete’s mindset of moving past mistakes and looking ahead to get over the interaction. This mindset feels like a very positive way of viewing socializing because it takes it less seriously. Comparing social interactions to a game lightens tension and is in my opinion a very smart way of living. The fact that the speaker considers the quality of his hugs demonstrates the idea that he is someone who overthinks. Overthinking is something many people including myself deal with, and it can be a source of anxiety for people. The speaker redirects the potential anxiety that could result from this interaction using this athlete mentality. This outlook allows him to overthink the interaction but not in a negative light in the way others might. I also appreciate the idea of working to improve oneself for others, specifically for a crush. Love is a great motivator and it can push one to become a better version of themselves. Love motivates me every day to keep improving myself and this poem does an excellent job of displaying that mentality.
ReplyDelete-Jack Dalton