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Maybe I'm not ready.
Or maybe I'm too good:
Maybe that creates a gap
like a torrent's carving flood.
Maybe you're distracted.
Or maybe you're too smart:
Maybe, after hurts on hurts,
you'll end before we start.
Maybe I'll surprise you.
Or maybe I'm the same
As every other cocky guy
who thinks
he owns his name.
Maybe you're a raging bitch.
Or sweet, but then forgetful:
Maybe life ' s too busy now
and you ' ll reply , regretful,
“Maybe we should meet sometime
This week, between its ends –
We act like we can write ourselves,
but every word pretends.
Sorry I didn't write you back last
night.
I know unknowns are stressful.
… But really, most of life's unknown
–
so you might as well be restful.”
*Thanks David (boy gazing beyond appropriateness {Turkey or so}), Julie (sunrise {Dubai}), Julie (waning day {Los Angeles}), Malaphone (road to open water {Lake Nacimiento}), Camille Seaman (sea ice growing deep and dark) and Megan (Katrina, fallen to sleep in a shopping cart {Iowa}) for making this collage full.
ReplyDeleteI was immediately drawn to this poem because of its title; it set up the importance of the mirror-like water right from the beginning, the power of the water to portray a situation identically but also with new perspective. Then I looked to the physical shape of the poem. It followed perfectly the wavering thoughts that the speaker finds himself stuck within; he first looks inward and shrinks down because of the realization of his own part in the trouble with his relationship, which is mirrored in the retracting text. Then he tries to build himself back up emotionally by projecting blame on the woman, which is seen in the rebuilding and gradual shift to the right of the text, until the final line where he finds himself again emotionally shrunken by the prospect of the relationship ending and the guilt he feels for trying to outsource his own despair. Then the words grow more and more spaced apart from one another just like the man and woman who, in the slippery slope of negative thoughts the man is creating for himself in his thoughts, are growing closer and closer to their own "boiling point." The final two stanzas were especially interesting for me because I often find myself visualizing the direction a future conversation may go, and this prediction is always biased by the emotions already evoked in thinking about that person. Also, those final stanzas took on a completely different tone from the first four: there seemed to be a loss of hope in the speaker when he realizes that his thoughts may not mirror exactly the way the relationship is going to pan out (just as the water, as it grows closer to boiling, looses some of its reflecting properties). Although I originally thought this might make the speaker happy because he knows there's a chance it may work out better than he had intended, I soon realized that just having these thoughts has planted a seed of fear that will forever change the relationship. The final word seems ironic in that although he knows he should just allow actions, not thoughts, drive the relationship, the speaker knows that this seed of fearful thoughts will forever make his relationship with the woman the very opposite of restful. Loved the poem! Fantastic work!
ReplyDeleteThere is no blame here - only maybes in a balance; there is no guilt here - only unsureness and limits of perception that prevent its resolution; there is no loss of hope here - only a man imagining a woman comforting his fretting mind, so that he can fall to sleep.
DeleteThe title of the poem immediately made me think of the common phrase “a watched pot never boils,” which I’m sure you intended. When I related that saying to the title “Watched pots boil thoughts” it made me think that the poem would possibly convey the idea of concentrating a lot on a specific situation or person, resulting in many thoughts about that focus of concentration, yet never reaching an ultimate conclusion or goal, as it will “never boil.” I believe that the poem does reflect that idea. There is an overwhelming sense of uncertainness in this poem, conveyed through the many “Maybes” and alternative outcomes (all of the thoughts from the watched pot.) While the speaker in the poem is unsure of his lover and his role in the relationship, he is okay with that. The lines “We act like we can write ourselves,/ but every word pretends” perfectly conveys the meaning of the poem, which I see as while we can try to define ourselves and control our fates, there are too many undecided factors that go into our being and life in general to truly know who we are and where we belong. The speaker realizes this. He acknowledges that not knowing the “unkown” is naturally stressful and frustrating, yet life is too unpredictable to be worried about that, so we should all just be “restful,” which he conveys through his dialogue with his lover.
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed this poem.
-Shaylyn Austin
I was first drawn to this poem because of the complex and busy collage filled with lots of dark colors and images. I think it is fascinating that the collage gradually gets lighter as it nears the bottom, almost like the light at the end of a tunnel of dark thoughts. The various images also represent how a person’s mind can wander from entirely unrelated topics very easily. When I looked at the title, I thought about the phrase “a watched pot never boils” and thought it was a clever interpretation of the common phrase. The act of simply watching a pot and waiting for the water to boil allows one’s mind to drift off and go down various rabbit holes. As an overthinker, I can very much relate to this situation and title as sitting and letting my mind wander is something that happens to me quite often. Something I noticed about the poem is that each phrase starts with the word “maybe”, which is a common thought for overthinkers who are unsure about themselves or their place in the world. This shows that the speaker is curious and uncertain rather than confident and sure about himself. The shape of the poem resembles steam coming from a boiling pot but also the endless stream of thoughts coming from the speaker’s mind. Each line follows an even curve pattern at the beginning and end, but in the middle the words are spaced out more and break the pattern. This could possibly be because these lines are filled with negative thoughts compared to the other lines which are more apologetic and poetic.
ReplyDelete