(2022 November 22)
I asked her if she was okay.
She told me I didn’t care.
I opened my arms;
would she like a hug.
She threw a ball of dirty tissues
into my chest.
I asked if I could throw them away.
She said go ahead,
then screamed in my ear as I passed.
I screamed back in her ear
“don’t scream in my ear!”
There’s the real You,
she said.
This particular poem was the most eye-catching to me out of all of Kuntzman’s poems because it is the one with the most potential for alternate interpretations, which varies according to one’s personal life experiences. When I initially read this poem, my mind created an image of an unhealthy relationship, where a desperate attempt at reconciliation unfolds against the underlying emotions of resentment and mistrust. The imagery of a woman telling her partner he neglects and does not care about her feelings suggests a pattern of broken promises and unkempt vows, emphasizing that he is unable to change his behavior. It is like he has repeatedly sworn to mend their relationship and regain her trust, only to fall short time and time again, leaving his partner feeling emotionally wounded and uncared for. Her throwing her tissues at him in the place of a hug symbolizes her reluctance to let him in, highlighting a profound sense of discomfort and mistrust in their relationship after so many broken promises and arguments. Instead of him being a place where she seeks solace and comfort, he is a place that brings her the pain she is trying to find shelter from. When she screams at him, and says that his reciprocated aggression is him showing his true colors, she is telling him that he is not someone who is caring, kind, or gentle. Instead, he is someone who brings pain to others, tricking them into believing his deceitful lies only to hurt them again in the end.
ReplyDeleteIt is amazing how much of our own lives, or gendered expectations, etc. we will allow to creep into the reading of a story that gives no context ~ just a simple, concrete moment in time.
Delete"a desperate attempt at reconciliation"
"a pattern of broken promises and unkempt vows"
"he is unable to change his behavior"
"he has repeatedly sworn to mend their relationship and regain her trust, only to fall short time and time again, leaving his partner feeling emotionally wounded and uncared for."
"so many broken promises and arguments"
"he is a place that brings her the pain she is trying to find shelter from"
I'm curious where these images come from in your life, making their way into this poem: books or tv show plots, commonsense notions of how men mistreat women, actual relationships of people close to you, or in your own life. Leading to such a quick belief that the person offering the hug is a pain-inflicter (and a male), and that the female violently screaming in the speaker's ear is an innocent victim.
As I was scrolling back through many of Kuntzman's poems, this one really intrigued me. Although it is not very long, it truly tells a story; which to me is the most important attribute of a poem. On my first read, I immediately imagined a fight between the speaker and woman who are in a relationship. The descriptive language paints a picture of anger and hurt as she tells her partner he does not care about her feelings. Directly following this, the line "Would she like a hug", really characterized the speaker in the poem. To me, I interpreted it like the woman's partner dismissing her feelings, thinking to himself she might want a hug, not because he actually wants to hug her. I think the reaction of the woman really symbolize the defense mechanism anger can be. Sometimes, when we are hurt it is easy to put a wall up, and instead lash out in anger instead of sadness. I think that idea is perfectly explained here. What really interested me the most in this poem though, was the ending. After the speaker yells back the woman says "There’s the real You". The woman has seen the speaker's true colors now and finds his actions unredeemable. I think the capitalization of "You" is important because it makes it clear the woman is speaking directly to the speaker, I can imagine in my head the tone of voice in which it was said. Overall, I found this poem powerful, It is so impressive to me how well Kuntzman is able to tell such a story in so few words.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was younger, I always used to read stories with the default presumption that people spoke truth, and what was being said was best taken at face-value, if I wanted to figure out what was going on.
DeleteAs I've gotten older, my approach has very much shifted to letting the words blur away, and focusing first on the actions: what are people DOING? around their words?" And this, I use to assess their character... and that, I use to decide how much I can trust their words.
Reading your interpretation ("she tells her partner he does not care about her feelings ... I interpreted [the hug offer] like the woman's partner dismissing her feelings ... the woman says "There’s the real You" ... [she] has seen the speaker's true colors now and finds his actions unredeemable") took me back to memories I haven't revisited in a long time: memories of going "Oh, this is clearly what's going on, because they said or implied so" and later going "Wait...it could actually be the opposite."
This poem, albeit short, caught my attention not only because of its conciseness but also because it leaves room for many different interpretations of its words. On my first read, the poem seemed like a prime example of a failing, unhealthy relationship; It is one where the two partners yell at each other and do not truly value each other’s presence. At first glance, it would seem like the woman is distressed while the man lovingly tries to help her. However, the unexpected reaction of the woman (throwing the tissues and yelling at the man) creates a sense of uncertainty in this narrative. It made me wonder if the man was only nice for this day, and if he was abusive on most other days. On the other hand, he could simply be asking to hug her to make her stop being sad and not because he genuinely wants to love her. Perhaps this sort of fight between the pair is recurring; the man did not seem to have much of a reaction to her throwing a bunch of dirty tissues at his chest after he offered to help her. The “real you” that the woman refers to in the last could refer to the man’s more typical, abusive nature, which she is terrified of. I also thought that it was interesting that this short poem was divided into many different stanzas, or sections, which, to me, helped emphasize the divide between the man and the woman in the relationship. Overall, the ability of this poet to create such an analyzable and interpretable poem in such few words is rather admirable.
ReplyDeleteThis poem genuinely caught my attention since it is a perfect example of a relationship without honeymoon love as its foundation. The speaker is trying their best in their mind to comfort their significant other. However, she's interpreting every gesture he makes in a negative way. When he asks her if "she's okay" she answers back that he doesn't care. She may find his tone to be ingenuine, making her feel unheard by him (but we don’t know since we’re seeing the speaker’s perspective). She must have realized or felt that the speaker doesn't express the amount of care that she desires. Then when the speaker asks if she wants a hug, she responds by throwing "a ball of dirty tissues." She doesn't feel comforted by the speaker's embrace and doesn’t want him to touch her, physically defending herself from his touch by throwing tissues at him. Then when the speaker yells at her to not scream in his ear, she responds with "that’s the real You." When she said this, I viewed this to be the moment the relationship ended. She sees the worst in him and believes the worst part of him is who he is. Every moment that he tried to show his care and love like asking to embrace her and offering to throw away the tissues she threw at him was meaningless to her. Her love for him is gone as she fixates on the negative aspects of him like characterizing him as a verbally violent person in her mind. Kuntzman shows the tension in a relationship and how easy it is to hurt one another. The speaker realizes that there's nothing that he can do to make her accept their love as she views him not as someone she loves but rather as a villain.
ReplyDeleteLily M.:
ReplyDeleteThe first thing I assumed about the poem “True story, this morning” is that it is about a man and his partner fighting. I immediately feel a sense of anger and frustration from her as she feels like her partner does not truly care about her. The speaker comes off as kind, trying to calm down his distressed partner. He feels as though he cannot do anything right. When he tries to give her a hug to make her feel better, she angrily declines. However, the woman’s reaction leads to a feeling of uncertainty about my initial assumption. From the woman’s attitude, I feel as though the speaker has not been putting enough effort into their relationship and plays the victim when they get into arguments. At the end of the poem, when he screams in her ear, the woman says, “There’s the real You.” She is telling him that he is not the warmhearted, caring man he makes himself out to be. At this point of the poem, I have completely changed my opinion on the speaker. He has shown his true colors. He is deceitful and manipulative, tricking his partner into thinking he is a loving man when in reality he brings her nothing but pain. When it comes to the formatting of the poem, I found it interesting that he divides the poem into 6 different stanzas, despite how short it is. However, the author successfully conveys an entire interpretable story in just a couple sentences, which is a talent that few people have.
A story - definitely. Successfully interpretable ... I'm beginning to question. But I think that's less about the accurate description of events, and more about people's willingness to believe a person they don't know who is saying something negative about someone else who is also completely unknown.
Delete